The Last Two Little Corporals who tried it came a Cropper*

Whilst I was having my breakfast this morning I perused the BBC News website on my iPad and came up with this little gem

German MPs warn UK EU exit would be ‘economic disaster’

‘The cross-party delegation from the Bundestag’s EU Affairs committee was in London to highlight Germany’s growing alarm at the danger of a possible UK exit.

The chairman of the committee said if Britain left the EU, it would be disastrous for its economy.’

I’ll draw a veil over the obvious fact that it is none of their bloody business and the equally obvious fact that millions died in two world wars so we would not have to take the ‘advice’ of Germans – or as my father and grandfathers would have described them, Huns, and simply point out this, the EU economy is going down the pan. Being a member of the EU is working out so absolutely swimmingly for the likes of Greece and Spain, let’s stay in the club.

Now, there are two reasons why Germany wants Britain to stay in the EU; the first is they want another sucker to help pay for the bloated EU budget, a budget that is going to get substantially bigger as, thanks to the Euro, more southern European economies go to the wall – if you don’t believe me have a look at what is going on in Italy and Portugal. The second reason is cultural, Britain’s political culture is completely different from that of Europe, it is based on Common Law not Roman Law, it is based on low state as opposed to ethical state theories and it has been uniquely successful when applied across the globe. Again, the countries that have ridden out the global economic crisis best are Australia and Canada which have stuck to the Anglo-Saxon economic model. The US economy is also going down the pan because Obama has adopted European style Social democratic policies. In short, the Germans want us in because they don’t want a more effective working alternative model on their doorstep that would undermine the oppressive, bureaucratic, liberty destroying statist model of the EUSSR or the Fourth Reich, call it what you like.

So my message to the German parliamentarians is this. Go fornicate yourselves. We’ll make our own decisions, our parents, grandparents and great grand parents gave us that right and we’re keeping it.

*With apologies to the late Sir Ralph Richardson and the scriptwriters of that wonderful film The Battle of Britain

What a Political Crisis 77 years ago tells us about Politics Today

I really am a very sad bastard. Just before Christmas I was browsing through a second hand bookshop and found Keith Middlemas and John Barnes 1000 page plus biography of Stanley Baldwin. Now, as I had already glanced at the TV schedules and discovered to absolutely no surprise that we were facing 150 channels of utter crap over the festive season I thought I might buy it and dip into it when the Downton Abbey box set began to pale.

It turned out to be a very wise choice, the Downton Abbey Christmas Special was such utter, utter tosh that I couldn’t face the box set, so I started ploughing my way through the Baldwin biography. (See what I mean about sad) Now Baldwin was joint equal second with Neville Chamberlin on my list of worst Conservative Prime Ministers ever, but well behind Ted Heath the winner by several light years. A Prime Minister so accurately described in one four letter word beginning with ‘C’ by James Delingpole in his magnum opus How to be Right.

Two things struck me as a result of reading the book; first of all Baldwin wasn’t quite as bad as I though he was. When the British public sticks its head in the sand there’s not a lot you can do about it, and the alternative government was much, much worse. Attlee’s Labour Party voted against the Army estimates in the House of Commons until 1938 at a time when Hitler was rapidly rearming Germany. Baldwin is now fifth on my list of worst ever Conservative Prime Ministers behind, Heath, Chamberlain, Macmillan and Eden.

The second came from the very long and complex chapter on the Abdication; that was that Edward VIII was a king 77 years ahead of his time. He was the ultimate feely, touchy, vacuous postmodern monarch; a better looking more charming version of the current Prince of Wales (please God let Her Majesty outlive him). Two repeated comments Edward VIII made during the crisis struck me as particularly apposite in the context of current politics. The first was his description of Wallis Simpson as the most wonderful woman in the world. I’m blessed with a happy marriage to a handsome, intelligent, witty husband (he’s giving me a tenner for writing this) but much as I love him, he is not the most wonderful man in the world. In my eyes he is, but without that qualification the statement is obsessive and meaningless.  The second statement that Edward VIII is recorded as making several times is ‘All that matters is our happiness’. Hitler had recently remilitarised the Rhineland, Dachau and Sachsenhausen had opened for business and Italy had invaded Abyssinia, but the only thing that mattered was the happiness of Edward VIII and Mrs Simpson. There is definitely something wrong with his priorities there.

Where does this fit with contemporary politics? What was being said by Edward VIII then and is still being said now is that our own deeply held wants and beliefs trump the wants and beliefs of others. That everyone should pursue their own wants and beliefs without considering the costs to others. We demand all the privileges that come with being a citizen of our country, but we aren’t prepared to take any of the responsibilities. The prevalence of this set of beliefs means that everyone thinks themselves uniquely right, and tolerance and compassion for any fellow citizens who disagree with us are dying. For me, reading about Abdication was a warning from history about the direction we’re headed. We should change course before it is too late.


Thank You Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner

Most of the time I loathe this country. I’m appalled by its low dishonest politics. I detest the way we’re in thrall to the EU. I despise the political correctness and cod sentimentality that blights our lives. Can’t stand the immigration that’s made me a stranger in the land of my birth, and utterly hate the way the dead hand of state bureaucracy is destroying our traditional liberties. But once in a while something happens that convinces me there’s still hope, that the country is still worth fighting for, and thanks to the lovely Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner, President of Argentina and botox queen, one of those somethings happened yesterday.
The Argentine economy is going down the pan. Her popularity is plummeting faster than Italian bond yields and there is unrest on the streets. So does the delightful Cristina do anything tangible to deal with a financial and economic crisis that has seen Argentinian Naval vessels impounded in ports to pay unpaid debts.
No, she does what bullying dictators have always done and picks a fight with a people smaller and weaker than her own. In this case 2000 Falkland Islanders. In this she was aided and abetted by the Guardian, a paper that hates everything that’s best about Britain and whose financial situation is about as good as Argentina’s.
In response to de Kirchner’s naked aggression, online forums have been filled with people taking up their keyboards to defend the Falkland Islanders. In terms that would make Palmerston proud, the British public have made it abundantly clear that the Falklands will be defended and God help the government that betrays them.
So thank you Cristina, you’ve made us show what I still fervently hope is our true nature. Well done love, I might even organise a whip round to help you get your ship back.

The 1945 Labour Government: The Government that Completely Buggered up Britain

But they set up the welfare state, the NHS etc… At this point I could just say ‘I rest my case case’ and move on. But I will present a slightly longer argument. Despite the fact Atlee in particular hated Soviet Communism, he was keen to adopt its methods in terms of nationalisation of the commanding heights of the economy and planning as a means to fulfil perceived social needs. That is why, when he adopted the laudable plan to ensure that healthcare was free to those who needed it, he did not adopt a mixed economy of health, he effectively nationalised healthcare and made the state virtually the sole provider. The NHS is the one institution more than any other whose bureaucracy and inefficiency has warped post-war British society. In Nye Bevan’s vision everything was free to everyone. A millionaire could get free false teeth and free prescriptions. The planning for this had to be done by the state. It was the British equivalent of Gosplan. Let’s be perfectly clear, it could never, ever work. The British belief in the miraculous qualities of the NHS is as irrational as those who believe in Mayan prophecies of the end of the world. It’s failures have also contributed to the cultural Marxism that blights our public discourse. The NHS is rubbish, it’s not the NHS’s fault or the wonderful people who work in it, it is the fault of filthy Tories/capitalists/private hospitals who starve it of funds or compete with it. Having a rational conversation with an NHS disciple is like trying to engage with a Jehovah’s Witness on your doorstep. Neither are part of the reality based community. However, at least Jehovah’s Witnesses don’t cost the taxpayer over 50 billion quid a year to provide the worst health care outcomes in the developed world. The NHS is simply the most egregious example of how the 1945 Labour Government buggered up Britain, its nationalisation programme stifled the enterprise we desperately needed to regain prosperity after World War II. The creation of the welfare state laid the foundations for the welfare dependency that blights the lives of the poor to this day. So the next time you hear anyone wittering on about how wonderful that government was remember they’re either stupid, a cultural Marxist, or a member of the Labour Party or most likely all three. In any event ignore them and stay in the real world.

View to a Hill Political Awards 2012

Watch out the Spectator you have competition

Prat of the Year: as noted in previous blog Julian Assange

Disillusionment of the year: the key revelation from the Andrew Mitchell affair, the police are lousy at fitting people up.

Moment of the Year: In Diamond Jubilee Year it has to be from Her Majesty, when she said ‘good afternoon Mr Bond.’ Loved the corgis too. Brilliant.

Stirrer of the Year: Has to be James Delingpole. He can annoy lefties by typing a full stop. He is what we should all aspire to be.

Right wing blogger of the year: Dan Hannan, always well argued, always thought provoking. An absolute hero of the campaign to get us out of the EU

Left wing blogger of the Year: Nick Cohen, I don’t agree with him but he has integrity, consistency and honesty, very very rare qualities on the left in Britain today.

Best live political speech I’ve heard this year: I’ve only had four to choose from and one of those was totally dire. But then Tim Kirkhope is an MEP. That leaves three, Julian Smith MP at Skipton and Ripon AGM, Kris Hopkins MP at Bentham Autumn Supper and Gavin Williamson MP at the Gargrave Political Supper.
Julian Smith’s was very good, but it was a bit hampered by being given in the context of an Association AGM, so it really is between Gavin Williamson and Kris Hopkins. Much as I admired Kris Hopkins for raising the toxic issue of grooming under age girls by Asian males, I thought Gavin Williamson’s was better. It was well argued, passionate and very witty. So Gavin Williamson gets the virtual award.

Politician of the Year: on the basis that I am judge jury and executioner of these awards and I am only going to choose proper Tories there’s not that much of a field. I’m tempted to go for Nigel Farage, but I’m not yet convinced that UKIP is more than a protest vote. So that leaves the field to those proper Tories who are actually in the Tory Party. I’ve whittled it down to a short list of three complete with citations.
John Hayes, for scuppering on shore wind and winding up his boss the utterly obnoxious Lib Dem, Ed Davey
Iain Duncan Smith, for his consistent principled and courageous attempt to help the least well off by reforming the welfare system.
Owen Paterson, for annoying bunny huggers over badgers and Lib Dems over wind. And for supporting shale gas extraction.
And the winner is Iain Duncan Smith. He really deserves a gong, even a virtual one for the way he’s stuck to his task.

I just hope the losers aren’t disappointed and the winners aren’t embarrassed.

Happy New Year Julian Assange

Happy New Year everyone
And I’d like to begin the New Year with a special New Year’s greeting to the person to whom I awarded my prat of the year 2012 prize. That is the narcissistic self-indulgent dickhead known as Julian Assange.
Now, I will draw a veil over the many reasons I despise him, the fact he believes he is above the law is one. The most important is his cavalier disregard of the welfare of British and American serviceman fighting Islamofascists in Afghanistan and simply focus on the wonderful pickle he’s got himself in.
In fact, I find it so entertaining I just have to think about it and my traditional New Year’s Day Hangover lifts, or perhaps that was because last night I had the sense to stick to 15 Year Old Dalwhinnie. A lovely gentle spirit.
To reiterate briefly, Assange got himself into trouser trouble in Sweden, a wonderful cuddly social democratic paradise where he’d wanted to base his website. However, on discovering that rape is frowned on there, the Swedish government suddenly became the running dogs of evil US Imperialists. Nonetheless, he decided, as was his right, to defend himself with the full majesty of the law, or even the EHCR. The EHCR turned out to be not so majestic after all, but also the running dogs of US Imperialists, and they had the temerity to turn down his appeals against extradition to Sweden with its notoriously arbitrary legal system and its cruel and unusual penal code.
So, did the wonderful Assange go to Sweden, no he skipped bail and holed up in the Embassy of that beacon of liberal values Ecuador.
And this is where the whole affair get’s very funny indeed. He’s stuck there, he can’t leave. He’s living on a put up bed in the pokiest Embassy in London for the foreseeable future. Apart from a rather stupid letter early in the crisis, the British government has played a blinder. It has gleefully said it will respect the Vienna Convention which protects Embassies but at the same time it has said, equally legitimately, if Assange leaves he will be arrested.
As the Embassy is in the middle of Knightsbridge the chances of him sneaking past Plod are about as likely as Andrew Mitchell being invited to address the Police Federation Conference. He has sentenced himself to indeterminate custody for a crime he says he did not commit. Compared to a Swedish jail it is extremely uncomfortable and unless he surrenders himself he has NO chance of leaving. The British government holds all the cards and can unequivocally take the high moral ground.
So Happy New Year Julian. I’ve got some 15 Year Old Dalwhinnie I need to polish off, so I’m going to raise a glass to your continued residence in the Ecuadorian Embassy. And as I do so I will have a lovely warm and fuzzy feeling that I’ll be able to the same next year, and the year after that, and the year after that, and ……